Naming Ceremonies

There are many reasons nowadays why people choose not to give their children an old-fashioned baptism. We chose not to have our children christened because we don't go to church and therefore felt it would be rather hypocritical. Some family members were a little upset, but to be honest, I think they were just cross at missing out on a party.

There are alternatives however. Your choice depends on your reasons for not wanting a christening. Katie from West Sussex chose to have a thanksgiving at her local church rather than a christening. She explains.

'When we had our first child we were both adamant that we wanted to let our children decide for themselves whether they wanted to be Christians or not. We had both grown up in non-practising Christian families, and had found our faith as adults, both being baptised by full immersion. We both felt that the ceremony had been extremely meaningful for us, and if we had our children baptised as children we would be taking that opportunity away from them.

We also felt that the christening or baptism of children was based on a very old-fashioned view of family life, essentially where the man of the house took the decision that it was to be a Christian household and that the children would therefore be baptised.'

If you do not feel that a religious ceremony is what you want, many local authorities offer a civil naming ceremony, rather like a registry office wedding. They can also be carried out at any suitable venue, just like a wedding. Your local authority will have its own regulations for these matters, so if you are interested, get in touch with them for details.

The ceremony can be used to express commitment to a child, to welcome an adoptee or children from a previous marriage. You can also usually announce and explain a choice of name and appoint supporting adults. The ceremony could even be used for an adult who wanted to change their name.

Maybe you would like a ceremony for your child but feel all of this is a bit formal. Well you could of course design your own ceremony in any way that was meaningful for you. You could have big family gathering at home and make your own speeches to welcome a child. You could have a simple private ceremony and plant a tree. This is a tradition in Russia, where the welfare of the child is thought to be reflected in how well the tree fares. Some local authorities will allow you to sponsor a tree in a local park, and you can invite friends and family to a planting ceremony. A lovely idea would also be to plant a rose with the same name as your child.

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